backcountry skiing!

at Brew Hut near Squamish/Garabaldi Lake/Brandywine Provincial park

so fun!

It was my very first time on a trail like that in skis, using skins, using telemark skis but it was awesome good fun! The weather wasn't ideal, it snowed on us the whole day, and the snow was pretty wet and not so deep, but still, so fun! I would absolutely do it again.

The first photo is me in the back of the Justy, my roommates sweet little two-door 4WD subaru. He loves going on the backcountry roads!! and he's so cute all loaded down with gear!

bodies

ok, what the F????

First of all, how is this competition even possible? What self-respecting person would ever take part in it and, most importantly, why are her cheeks so exposed and his so freaking covered??? gender inequality anyone???

AND, why on EARTH were these photos found under a link for 'girl power at the american music awards'? Girl power? are you KIDDING me???

i love medical research part II

Beware of heart attacks in the springtime!
i mean, seriously, how did it even occur to them to research this?
and what does that say about jet lag?
and what a powerful argument for the absolutely RIDICULOUS social construction of time!

http://content.nejm.org/cgi/reprint/359/18/1966.pdf

multiculturalism, or why can't we all just get along?

ive been reading this book today about multiculturalism that has challenged my ideas about culture in a truly fundamental way. I'll hopefully add more to this post later, but it's been a tough read, to say the least.

ok, back to the feminisma

another perspective on the whole FGM thing:

from Shweder, Richard A. "What about “Female Genital Mutilation”? And Why Understanding Culture Matters in the First Place."

“Imagine an African mother living in the United States who holds the following convictions. She believes that her daughters a well as her sons should be able to improve their looks and their marriage prospects, enter into a covenant with God, and be honored as adult members of the community via circumcision. Imagine that her proposed surgical procedure (for example, a cut in the prepuce that covers the clitoris) is no more substantial from a medical point of view than the customary American male circumcision operation. Why should we not extend that option to the Kono parents of daughters as well as to the Jewish parents of sons, for example? Principles of gender equity, due process before the law, religious and cultural freedom, and family privacy would seem to support the option.

Or imagine a sixteen-year-old Somali teenager living in Seattle who believes that a genital alteration would be “something very great.” She likes the look of her mother’s body and her recently circumcised cousin’s body far better than she likes the look of her own. She wants to be a mature and beautiful woman, Somali style. She wants to marry a Somali man, or at least a man who appreciates the appearance of an initiated woman’s body. She wants to show solidarity with other African women who express their sense of beauty, civility, and feminine dignity in this way, and she shares their sense of aesthetics and seemliness. She reviews the medial literature and discovers that ht surgery can be done safely, hygienically, and with no great effect on her capacity to enjoy sex. After consultation with her parents and the full support of other members of her community, she elects to carry on the tradition. What principle of justice demands that her cultural heritage should be “eradicated” and brought to and end? "

ok, back to the feminism

anxiety again

ok, a departure from the recent feminist theme.

isn't it strange the things that can cause anxiety?

ive placed mine.  the one that caused that frantic post of last week, and the one that caused the rise in my blood pressure im experiencing now.

it's an individual.  and individual with a frightening amount of power towards my academic future and with whom i have had an unfortunate conflict in past.

the conflict im referring to was probably one of the most intense professional conflicts of my adult life, and frightening in its implications for, as i say, my academic future.

and even though it was more or less resolved, im still anxious.

we just had a perfectly pleasant interaction.

and my heart is in my throat.  

how bizarre is that?

medical research is so cool

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/7735696.stm

i mean, seriously.

age old customs...

i think this may quickly be turning into a blog about feminism. who knew?

one of the most striking scenes in the novel 'memoirs of a geisha' (can't remember if it was as powerful in the movie or not) was the result of the auction for her virginity. she achieved the highest price ever paid, and was given to a doctor, who (and in some ways this was the most striking part of the whole scene) collected the blood smeared sheets of all the women whose virginity he had purchased. he cuts the sheet, and then pulls out this case full of little vials, all with something brown and crusty inside them, all labelled with the names of the women he had purchased...

what is with our obsession with that first time?

here's a girl choosing to make her millions of it.

just down south in the good ol' US of A...

http://cbs13.com/local/selling.virginity.tuition.2.815171.html

purity

My friend Sara told me about something incredibly disturbing Saturday night. In reference to my research topic, it is so scarily similar in so many ways it genuinely freaks me out. They're called purity balls, they're about preserving your daughters' "purity" and they seem to me to be just a few short steps away from the measures that many of the families I read about so regularly take to preserve their daughters' "purity" as well.

http://www.glamour.com/sex-love-life/2007/01/purity-balls

http://generationsoflight.myicontrol.com/

the pledge:

fgm revelation

it is really distressing, this thesis topic of mine.

when i first started researching it for a paper last term, the first book i read made me physically ill.

female genital mutilation

circumcision

cutting

the cutting, removal, of the clitoris, 

removal of all the outer genital parts, and enclosing of the vaginal opening

stitches with acacia thorns

the descriptions used by so much of the literature are so present, so real

they describe the screams of the girls, the children, the smell of the blood

it's designed to make you hate it, to cause shock, dismay, horror, repulsion

i thought i was over it though.  quickly hardened to the cold bare facts of the subject.  its true i usually skip the descriptive bit when im reading these days, but even when i do read it, im mostly numb to the intended emotional reaction of the words.

or so i thought.

recently i had even almost begun to think that it really was none of anyone's business what a particular group choose to do to their genitals, that ideas of sexuality were so socially constructed that the importance of a clitoris might be overvalued anyway.

the other night i had a revelation to the contrary.

and it has left me deeply saddened.  deeply emotionally attached to these women ive been reading about, to these women whose suffering drive the activism of so many devoted women across the globe.

gone is my supposed academic distance, my objective view of the subject

instead i feel sorrow, on behalf of women who don't know that they should be sorry, who believe that what they are living is what is right, what is good, what is pure, what is just. 

maybe it's just my idea of good and right against theirs, perhaps it is highly, and injustly, superior of me, as well as presumptuous, to impose my sorrow onto them.

but i do. whether they want it or not, whether it is right or not.  i am deeply, truly sorry.

bipolar?

i think reading these last few entries, which have taken place over the course of a mere 36 hours should give anyone interested a fairly clear idea of the level of my mood swings these days.  yesterday morning school was 'remarkably stress free'.  today i am struck by anxiety.  

nothing like mood swings to make a girl feel crazy.

too many

men, i tell you.

too many men.

just when i think ive got it narrowed down, one ive forgotten about will call me, or email, or message on skype...

no wonder im so stressed out

coffee and cigarettes

god damn anxiety

creeps up from behind and takes you over

s'wonderful

isn't it? 

how happiness in one area of life can so positively affect all areas of life.  Even while I sit here distracted by delightful memories made over the past few days, I find myself more focussed and more able to get work done than I have been for weeks.  

marvelous.

life's pretty good these days, I have to say.  the roommates rock, friends in vancouver rock, and im very pleased to be making some more, very cool friends recently, mostly through the marching band.  so that's only getting better.  

school is remarkably stress-free.  i feel like i should be more stressed out, but i'm just not.  it's possible i should be doing more work than i am, but it's very hard to say.  i still plan on deciding in december whether to stick with this thesis thing or whether to chicken out and do an extended essay.  i really do want to finish the thesis if i can though.  to the point that i might even stick around for hte summer to finish, if need be, if april 17 proves to be impossible.  it really shouldn't be though.

ive been cooking a lot lately, and i really love that as well.  it creates a wonderful lifestyle, making time to make almond milk (or butter, as it turned out, curse safeway and the hidden cheesecloth...), and homemade soup and muffins and bread.... im starting to feel like a housewife... to myself.  if that is possible?  but i think it is.  and it's nice. like im taking care of myself.  actually, that's exactly it.  i feel cared for, recently, and i think the cooking is a big part of it.  as is the incredible emotional support ive been getting and giving from some very dear and special friends, and of course my wonderful family.